


Devil Caretaker

by AZookiex3



Series: Lucifer Morningstar & Reader Requests [2]
Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Anxiety, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-25
Updated: 2019-07-25
Packaged: 2020-07-19 06:18:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19969405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AZookiex3/pseuds/AZookiex3
Summary: You have it all: dream job as a successful book writer, the best close-knit friends a girl could ask for, and a God damned [literally] beautiful boyfriend. So, why did your depression keep insisting on being a prick?





	Devil Caretaker

**Author's Note:**

> Request: Anon: Can you make a one shot with Lucifer being the readers boyfriend's and she's been locked in her house for days, she barely moves from the couch, hasn't eaten in a while and Lucifer comes to check on her, she not really responsive and he kinda has to make her eat and gives her a bath (Not anything sexual he's just taking care of her) because she just refuses to get up, and after all that he just holds her while she cries. And just fluff towards the end.
> 
> AN: This is dedicated to all those who suffer anxiety/depression, I'm with you. Some days are grey, but it picks up again. Keep on truckin'! I'm always here!
> 
> Warnings: Depression/Anxiety, Swearing

"Shit."

You lay on your back, staring up at the ceiling. You stare angrily, hoping that would make those dark slithery threads reseed back into the dark corners of your mind.

But of course, it didn't work.

"Why?" You question your ceiling. Your face now turning sad.

You force yourself out of bed and drag yourself to your bathroom. You throw off your t-shirt and shorts and turn the shower faucet to blasting hot. You step inside and drown yourself in the heat. Your body screamed.

_ Good. Make this feeling go away. _

As you wash yourself you think about the  _ amazing  _ night you had. 

Lucifer picked you up from your first book signing and took you to LUX, where he planned a surprise celebration party for you. Chloe, Ella, Dan, Linda, Maze, and even your publisher and editor were there to celebrate with you. Since it was such a small group LUX was still open to the public, but your party started before the club opened.

You remember the feeling of pure joy at seeing your friends all together for you. You remember the feeling of  _ love  _ you felt for Lucifer for thinking about you so much. You were so happy with your mini family that you didn't even think about the other guests in the building.

But  _ now  _ you were, and try as you might to focus on that  _ love  _ of the night, the  _ hate  _ outgrew it.

Numerous times throughout the night you'd catch hateful glares thrown your way. It was something you were used too whenever you'd hang out with Lucifer during LUX hours.

This time however, you couldn't stop thinking about them.

About the group if girls who gossiped about you. How they can't believe someone like  _ Lucifer  _ would  _ ever  _ be in a relationship with a  _ writer _ . A  _ nerd _ . 

About the group of men who disapproved of your style, your look. They can't believe a guy like  _ Lucifer  _ would  _ ever  _ sleep with such a "safe" looking woman. How he could be attracted to your non-model body. 

About the men and women who  _ blatantly  _ try and try to cut in between you and Lucifer dancing together. How they'd  _ always  _ try to scoot closer and closer to him while you two sat together.

About how Lucifer clearly rejected one girl from trying to  _ sit  _ on him. During then you were filled with pride with how strong your relationship was.

But these dark threads were now pulling up the thought you kept hidden way. The thought of how you  _ swore  _ you saw Lucifer look the girl up and down as she swayed away. 

You  _ know  _ he didn't, at least not on purpose. It's a natural thing to stare at something attractive to the eye. Hell,  _ you  _ even stared at her. 

You  _ know  _ this.

But those  _ fucking  _ dark threads were starting to change what you saw. 

You smack your head on the tiled wall. You shut off the water and throw your robe on, not even bothering to dry your body or comb your hair.

You stomp to the kitchen and throw open the cabinets. You grab the first cereal box you see and pour yourself a bowl. You swallow it down quickly, knowing that once the threads take hold it'll be the  _ only  _ thing you eat.

You wash the bowl and walk over to your writing desk. You open up a new word doc and hover your fingers over the keys, hoping  _ something  _ will come to you soon in a last attempt to beat this.

It didn't work.

Your arms fall to your sides. You lean back against your chair and throw your head back. Eyes shut tight and allowing the darkness to take over.

_ Day 1 _

* * *

_ Day 3 _

You lay bed. Your blinds and curtains were over the window to keep the space dark. You wake in and out of sleep, getting up only to use the bathroom and drink some water. The rest of the time you lay there staring at the clock, waiting to fall back to sleep.

You check your phone every now and then. Giving normal replies to people so no one would suspect anything.

It took you the longest to reply to Lucifer. The darkness growing stronger as you're filled with self-hatred for lying to him.

But you do it anyways. Giving him the same normal replies with an added emoji here and there.

You hoped he wouldn't suspect anything.

* * *

_ Day 5 _

Lucifer is sitting in Ella's lab and just staring at his phone. He doesn't pay attention to whatever crime details Ella and Chloe are discussing. He's too focused on  _ why  _ you haven't been answering your phone.

Unbeknownst to him, the first time you heard your phone ring your anxiety spiked to max and you threw your phone across the room. 

"Lucifer?" He looks up to see Chloe and Ella looking at him with concern.

“Have either one of you heard from y/n recently?” he asks. The two women share a look and shake their heads.

“This happens sometimes, Lucifer.” Chloe says.

“What happens?”

“Depression.” Ella sighs, “Swear that stuff is the  _ real  _ Devil.” Lucifer gives her a look.

“She’ll be ok, Lucifer.” Chloe draws his attention back on her, “Just give her some time. She usually comes out of it on her own.”

“But how  _ much  _ time? I haven’t seen or heard her voice in five days already!” 

“I usually give her about two weeks before I charge in, but,” Chloe stands before him and puts a hand on his shoulder. She squeezes lightly and gives him a smile, “she has  _ you  _ now. You decide when to charge in and save her.”

* * *

_ Day 7 _

You sit on your couch and numbly flick through channels on the TV. You settle for some old black and white show and throw the remote on the coffee table. You curl up into your blanket and just stare at the screen, watching yet not. 

Someone knocks on your door and that stirs you alive for a moment, before you settle back into the indent you made in your couch.

_ I've got no lights on, it's dark. They'll leave when they realize no one is home. _

Because in fact, no one is home.

The knocking continues for another minute before it's silent. You take in a breath of relief.

But then the door knob starts to turn.

You hear a familiar whistle, "Dark in here isn't it? Darling, where are you?" You cover yourself more in the covers after hearing your love's voice.

_ No, please. Not now. You can't see me like this. _

He follows the only light source to the living room. He walks into the space and sees the back of your head illuminated by the light from the tv. 

"Hmm, terribly gloom in here, darling. That can't be helping." He walks over to your windows, "This should help!" He pulls apart the curtains and opens the blinds to bring in the early afternoon sunlight. 

You hiss disapprovingly and hid under the blanket fully. Lucifer has to hold in a laugh at your reaction.

"See? Isn't that better?" You feel the weight of the couch dip next to you indicating he has sat down. You scoot away from him the best you can all wrapped up.

"Come now, love. I haven't seen your face in days!" He goes to unwrap the blanket on top of your head, but your throat makes more sounds of disapproval and you lean away from his touch.

Lucifer wasn't haven't any of it, and there was no way you could fight the strength of the Devil. He unwraps you till your top half is exposed.

You refused to look him in the eye. You didn't want to see the disgust that just  _ had  _ to be on his face. You haven't washed yourself in days, and knew that your body odor was strong and your hair was all greasy. 

But still, Lucifer takes your chin lightly in his fingers to turn your head to him. You take a quick peek at his eyes and your own go wide.

There's no disgust at all, and he's  _ smiling _ , "There's my beautiful girlfriend."

You still don't give him any kind of response. Your eyes are still wide, but now were filling with tears as he runs a palm softly down your face and pushes the oily hair out of your eyes.

He kisses your forehead, "I'm going to make something for you to eat, darling. Here," he takes the remote and flips it to a more modern show, "this will be  _ much  _ more entertaining."

He leaves you alone. The dark threads hold your hands down to stop you from reaching for him. Just  _ seeing  _ him helped you see that small break in the darkness.

_ Well, he is the Lightbringer _ .

You turn back to the tv and wipe the wetness from your eyes. These threads weren't ready to let you go so easily. Lucifer realizes this himself when he brings you a sandwich for you and you don't touch it.

He doesn't give up. He cuts the sandwich into tiny cubes and holds one cube at a time to your lips. The shine in his eyes makes you start to tear up again, but it also makes you open your mouth. Little by little, the sandwich is gone and the crack in the darkness grows.

"Good job, love." Lucifer's smile is warm and bright. He gives you another kiss on the forehead then takes the plate to the kitchen to wash it. You then watch him disappear into your bedroom. You can hear water start to run and your heart jumps. 

He comes around the corner a few minutes later wearing nothing but one of his fancy silk robes that he left here. He comes over and turns off the tv before looking down at you.

"Ready for a spa treatment, love?" You don't answer, but it seems like he didn't expect an answer. He asks with his hands if he can pick you up, and his smile beams when you remove the blanket from your body and hold your arms up. He picks you up bridal style and walks to the bathroom. 

You see he has a bubble bath ready when he drops you to your feet. He helps you undress and get inside the tub. He then removes his robe and sits behind you. 

You're worried at first, but when he starts pouring water on your head and scrubs shampoo on your scalp you realize he really is  _ just  _ taking care of you.

_ Damn it _ . The waterfall of tears was getting harder to hold back. 

You two are in the tub for a good thirty minutes before Lucifer is satisfied. He gets out first then helps you out. He removes the plug in the tub, and you listen to the water running down the pipe as he dries you. He helps you into your robe and sits you down on the toilet. He quickly dries himself and puts on his robe before coming to you with a comb.

It takes a  _ long  _ time for him to get all the knots out, but he never complains. Never comments on it. He just smiles and hums a tune you recognize as one of your favorites as he combs. 

Once your hair feels like normal he picks you up, once again bridal style, and lays you on the bed. He walks to the other side and lays down next to you.

You can't take it anymore, "Why?" You croak it out so quietly you think he didn't hear you.

But he's  _ Lucifer _ , of course he heard, "Why what, darling?"

"Just…" but it's getting harder and harder to speak over the lump in your throat. 

Lucifer notices. He lifts your chin up so your eyes can meet, "Darling, I'm here for you  _ whenever  _ and for  _ whatever.  _ Don't ever feel like you have to go through this feeling alone, or that I would somehow be turned off by it." He gives you a feather light kiss and smiles to you:

"You  _ are  _ my love, my light. No matter the darkness that surrounds you, know that I'll be here for you as your Devil caretaker." He winks at the last part and you can't hold it anymore.

You pull him tight to you. Resting your head under his chin you let the waterfall of tears out. He holds you tight and runs one hand through your hair while the other goes up and down your back.

* * *

The next morning you wake up in the same position. 

You pull slightly back to look at Lucifer's sleeping face.

You smile and kiss him awake.   
_ My Lightbringer _ .


End file.
